This Just In! Celebrity Dealer God Announces Career Change!

[Rick Research]

This was brought to my attention. In consequence, and subsequent thereto, I have returned from worshipping at the Altar Of The Great God Rolf, who spaketh unto me as in a dreameth and sayeth unto me that is the Ricky of Righteous Reebon Barzs:

"And lo, this dood does not have even a solitary clue... and he shall henceforth goeth unto the antique malls and selleth Beanie Babies, for he knoweth NOT wherof he selleth!"

Scans © the truly, truly LEGENDARY seller:

[Rick Research]

And The Great God Rolf continu-ed to spaketh, Long May His Mighty Voice Echo As Unto The Thunder In His Holy Enclos-ed Precinct, and Rolf sayeth unto me, yea, verily,

"This is the tale that this ... uncleanliness telleth, in plain confession of its manifest sins, and the presence of it Pleaseth Me NOT:

And the tale that this revealeth of itself is thus:

1) Iron Cross in first place indicates supposed "Prussian," and yet

2) purports to be Saxon St Henry Order-- their highest award, and one awarded to so few non-Saxons I runneth not out of awesome fingers and toes in the counting of them. The crown device was never authorized. Nor have I have seen it but on perhaps 2 or 3 original, but naughtily non-regulation ribbon bars. It is, however, a mainstay of The Evil One Who Dwelleth In The Land Of O-Hi-o's vile and corrupt False Wares.

3) Saxon Merit Order with swords was (except for Saxon Military Officials-- not a one of whom EVER got a Saint Henry Order) the MIDDLE grade between basic Albert Order with Swords and a St Henry. It was even LESS often awarded to non-Saxons than the Saint Henry-- one and a half feet's toes, maybe.

4) the next ribbon in 4th place is NOT, however, a Saxon Albert Order... but a Saxon Saint Henry MEDAL. Which means that this Fine Recipient had to have been an enlisted man in 1914-- which means he could not have risen higher than LEUTNANT during the war. Remember that, mortal men!

5) Fifth haveth we a peacetime award from the Principality of Hohenzollern-- one of the tiniest and least frequently encountered REAL ribbons on German ribbon bars. It is, however, yet another mainstay of the O-Hi-o Frankenstein parts frauds, since SO MUCH never used (no call for it) period German dealer stock remained. Quite the unlikely thing for our "Pruxon" or "Saxian" enlisted man to have picked up, pre 1914!

6) Sixth we haveth the peacetime ribbon of the Bavarian Military Merit Order or Cross. It must be the "Cross," of course, since our Fine Fellow was still an enlisted man in 1914 (4). More utterly improbable.

7) Ah! That's REAL nifty! Our Fine Fellow was in the Imperial armed forces over the winter of 1896-1897...

and yet... no NCO long service award (from... anybody!) And yet... he was STILL an "other rank" SEVENTEEN YEARS LATER... in 1914! And yet, having dragged through noncommissioned ranks part time (no long service) all that time, he was such a Fine Soldier he got TWO awards from non-Prussian, non-Saxon states, and then went on to win TWO grades of Saxony's highest award...


and yet no non-Saxon Leutnant got a Saint Henry Medal and a Saint Henry Order-Knight."

And then there was a Mighty Hollow Booming, near and yet distant, and the sound as of Mighty Waters hidden and yet raging unseen, and He Who Is Glazed In Dazzling White continu-ed,

"But There is MORE that is Awful And Bad!"

[Rolf D.]

Altar Of The Great God Rolf

You are too kind..

[Rick Research]

"For when pressed by a believer, the False Prophet sayeth, though he knoweth not anywhich of what he had spake, therein, that the Tale was NOT as thus Truly Reveal-ed, but THIS, that is Wrong, Oh So Painfully WRONG:

'1) EK 2
2) Mecklenburg-Scgwerin Order of the Griffin
3) Saxon Friedrich August Silver Medal with Swords
4) Mecklenburg-Schwerin Military Service Cross 2nd Class
5) Something from Hohenzollern but I am not sure what
6) Schauburg-Lippe True Service Cross 2nd Class
7) Wilhelm I Centenial Medal.'"

And great was the Ire And Indignation of TGG Rolf, long may He Self-Purify & Refreshen, for 3 out of 7 indicateth that the False Prophet hath not the Basic Knowledge Of A Newbie, and yet he demandeth all the same in the local currency

$125.00

for this abomination.

For such it is. And our Powers are mighty. Unseen, yet we Knoweth that which is hidden. And the sight of the Hidden Thing, Which Is Unclean and Stinketh Unto Our Nostrils even when unseen, so that we knoweth it without seeing it, which should not be seen, for that is this:

[Rick Research]

This image © The Forces Of Good

That's right!

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Tis The Dreaded (And Obvious) HAND SNIPPED BRASS CATCH ON BRASS BACKING WITH DEVICES HOLES DRILLED ONLY FOR THE DEVICES!!!!

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[Rick Research]

And such was the Wroth Of Rolf at this Foulness that I reached for the Holy Forest By-Product Scroll:



and yet that which was always there, was not there!

"O Mighty Rolf!" I cried, "Why hast thou forsaken me in this, my hour of need!?"

And with frustrated weepings and reproachful lamentations did echo the Voice of the Shining Waterproof One:

"Have I not sent down Holy Writ, so that Every Thing is explain-ed?"

[Rick Research]

"As it was, so it is and it should be," sayeth the Ricky Of Reebon Barzs Righteousness, appalled and yet revolted that there could BE such Truly Awful Rejection Of Long Revealed Truths.

And once more spoke the Mighty Voice That Echoes Beneath The Ground and it sayeth this:

"That which I have seen is unfit and unseemly. Bring it to my Sacred Altar, which gleameth as alabaster. Dip it in the Purifying Waters, and then send it to the deeps from which it Shall Never Return, for that is where it belongs."

And as it was said, so it is and should be.

<marquee behavior> WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH</marquee>

[Brian S]

Yes, it is definitely Beanie Babies for you...

[landsknechte]

As someone who routinely slows down to look at traffic accidents, could you be so kind as to forward me a link to this Ohioan's website?

[Blitz]

Ricks new year has certainly had a painfull start..

[Sal Williams]

This is so CONFUSING!!! Rolf I take it is not the culprit but the spotter of travesty? How can you tell the thing is only drilled for specifis devices ( I take it devices are ribbons or the little metal awards on them?) I don't see any holes at all. I don't think a mere mortal like myself can ever get it!!! . I am going to go read rRicks article right now just to find out how much more there is that I dont even know I don't know! I hope it is not written in "Olde Rickian".

Best. Sal

[Bill D.]

Um....when wil the King James version of this post be available?

[Rick Research]

No, That Was The OLD Testament Version

Kids today! "Worshipping at the Altar of the Great God Rolf" was what we called kneeling into the ahem commode post-binge puking (from the gagging "rollllllf" noises) when I were in college in the '70s.

Our real Rolf is not involved.

I find humorous mockery in this, yet latest example of Dunderhead "Professional" Inadequacy to be more therapeutic than ripping this cluelessly smug "elite" dealer loser a new one with anger.

Any "professional" Self Anointed Titan of Imperial Dealing who can't even identify ribbons, who can't even recognize the now thoroughly and totally discreditted products of that Busy Little Man From Ohio...

well, what more can I say? Without even a basic background in wares sold, let alone mastery of multiple fields where mistakes are of such a crawl in a hole and die from shame, locked room with single bulleted revolver MORTIFYINGLY stupid nature...

wups. See, told you humor was better than anger.


FLUUUUUUUUUSH!


And yet, some clueless type will undoubtedly stumble along and, overcome with all the seller's dazzling self promotion, shell out over 100 bucks for this piece of GARBAGE that probably wholesales at about forty bucks (and isn't worth THAT, either), from the Busy Little Man From Ohio. I haven't seen said BLMFO on my territory in over a year, so don't know if his Buy Direct show prices have gone up. The grotesque errors certainly haven't improved.

I had noticed, in my last few personal interactions, that he had "branched out" into things like 1870/95 "WW1" ribbon bars. How "honored" we Imperialoids must be, that such a prolific business tycoon is now targeting US as well as Third Reich collectors! And yet, of course, his ribbon stock is not even period, so don't even need a black light.

Don't even need to flip over and see the Hideous Reverse.

Don't even need more than several years collecting experience to recognize-- let alone Decades As Master Of Sales.

[Doug See]

Say what? I sat through three hours Lord of the Rings III and understood most of it, but my attention span isn't long enough to decode this one. Are you saying this is a bad ribbon bar, or that the dealer is misinformed?

Either way, I take it you didn't buy this?

[Rick Research]

The ribbon bar is Truly Flushable.

The dealer could stunt double for Homer Simpson. He and Big Ron must be twins separated at birth.